But God is Bigger

"And there went out a champion out of the camp of the Philistines, named Goliath, of Gath, whose height was six cubits and a span... Then said David to the Philistine, Thou comest to me with a sword, and with a spear, and with a shield: but I come to thee in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom thou hast defied. This day will the Lord deliver thee into mine hand; and I will smite thee, and take thine head from thee; and I will give the carcases of the host of the Philistines this day unto the fowls of the air, and to the wild beasts of the earth; that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel. And all this assembly shall know that the Lord saveth not with sword and spear: for the battle is the Lord’s, and he will give you into our hands." (1 Samuel 17:4, 45-47)

Ever since I started my mission papers it seems that my trials were ramped up in many different ways. I fractured and sprained my foot, I got the run around from my doctor in two separate appointments, far too many panic attacks to count at this point, exams this week, several essays and presentations during the last week, looking at my checking account makes me want to cry, my dog is old and likely dying, my wardrobe dwindles smaller every time I sort through it getting rid of immodest and ill fitting clothing, I fly out to Utah in 12 days, I woke up late this morning and nearly missed my millionth doctor appointment, I locked my keys in my car, and not being able to go to the temple with my family before I leave for Utah because I need my mission call. 

Friday and Saturday I felt like my chest was going to explode. I felt trapped and scared. How was I going to get everything done in time? Should I go back out to Utah for the summer? Will my foot be healthy enough for me to work? Will it give me problems on my mission? Will I ever turn in my paperwork? Will my doctor cooperate with me?

I prayed and prayed for help. Because of a quiet prompting I then wrote down everything that needs to get done in a list. I put this list in a folder that contains things that need to be dealt with soon such as my immunization record, wisdom teeth evaluation referral, etc. I, yet again, am learning the hard way that my way isn't always the best way. Now that I'm more organized, my list is nearly completely checked off. My anxiety levels are minimal. My podiatrist said that my foot should be back to normal within two to three weeks (let's pray it is two please). My mission papers are nearly complete. God is good! 

We all have Goliaths in our lives. We all have trials that seem too big and too difficult to bear. But you know what? Goliath might be big, but God is bigger. 

I testify to you that I know that Christ suffered, died, and lived again for each of us. He suffered so that He knows our trials and that He can provide the mercy we need. He died so that the dead may hear his message also. He lived so that we may live again through His grace. I know that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is God's true church. I know that God is so much bigger than our trials. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen. 

Hurdles

Today in sacrament meeting a sister gave an amazing talk in which she told the following story about her daughter: 

Her daughter, Kathy, decided she wanted to join the track team in her freshman year of high school. She practiced faithfully. Her first meet came along. The gun went off and she started to run. She made the first hurdle, the second, and then the third! She came to the next hurdle and she missed it. She came to the next one, and she missed it. She continued to miss them, but she kept going. The crowd was on their feet, she got to the last one, and she missed that one too. Her hands and knees were bloody, but she kept going. She crossed the finish line. 

That young woman has the very patience and character that I want! Don't we all? I know that oftentimes when I'm knocked down, I storm away or keep running, deliberately running past the hurdles. I have gotten better, I still struggle with the urge to give up, but don't we all? Adversity is one of the greatest elements of life that build us to be better people. I will be straight with you, life doesn't get easier. Life will never get easier, we only get stronger. I'll bet you anything that Kathy learned that she needed more practice, where she messed up, and decided to fix it for next time, or the hurdles weren't the event for her.

We are never given a trial that doesn't have a purpose. Sometimes we may wish we didn't get such a low grade in a class, that person didn't break your heart, your disability didn't get in the way, or whatever your trial may be. Life is hard; the world isn't going to be what we want it to be. People will come along and disappoint us, embarrass us, and break our hearts. It's a guarantee, it is a part of life. It is our job to keep our head held high and keep moving forward. Don't let life and people knock you down. God created you strong and powerful, don't let anyone deceive you. He can help us heal and let us break free of our sadness and depression. He can help us forgive and love our enemies.

C. S. Lewis put it best when he said, "Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on: you knew those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently he starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of—throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace."

He knows our trials and he knows us. He loves each and every one of us so much that we cannot comprehend this love. He will help us through our trials, if we let him. We must be humble enough to do our best, pray to do better, read our scriptures, and find all of the ways that we can be lifted up. I know this to be true, I have had trials of my own, and I have found comfort and safety in the arms of my Redeemer who has greater plans for me than I can imagine. I bear my testimony of the strengthening power of trials and the gift of grace. I leave these things with you in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.