Anxiety and Testimonies

I realized a few days ago I never wrote down what I learned from the plunge into anxiety I had starting really a year ago. A friend of mine asked how he could help a friend who was struggling with mental health stuff and was questioning his testimony and if it even made a difference seeing that our mental states can be altered by medications and therapies. Here are my thoughts:

The secret to knowing the gospel is true AND SEEING THE RESULTS is by trying it with real intent, not just asking. That's also the thing with mental illness, you can't expect to feel better by reading about medications and therapies, you must act and it takes some trial and error. (Side note, they've actually done studies and there's a certain part of the brain that is active during Christian prayer that isn't active in other methods of prayer). Much like my companion with diabetes, she kept up with her diabetes not only because she wanted to live, but because she knew that if she was healthy she could feel the Spirit more. 

I also know that the Lord has a special place in his heart and hand for those of us with mental illnesses. I know I felt a special protection in a way during the transfer that I struggled the most with my anxiety and depression. I talked to my mission president about going home. At that time i was studying the words of Christ in the New Testament and through studying the New Testament I gained a more sure witness of Christ and his character, but also of the Book of Mormon. I learned of Christ's love and plan in the Book of Mormon, and in the New Testament I learned of His character and the way He taught.

I know 100% that the Book of Mormon is true, not only because of the testimony I gained on my mission, but from my continued reading of it.

I also know that I am not happy and cannot feel joy when I am not on my meds. I am not me. The Lord provided medicines so that we can balance out many of the chemical problems our brains have. It's when we are "normal" we feel the Lord's guidance more because we aren't as much of a slave to the temptations of our own minds.

I know I did feel the Spirit several times when my anxiety took a plunge and I really struggled, but those times were of great intensity and weren't very often. I was so wrapped up in the anxiety that I felt like I was drowning in my own thoughts. The Lord never wants us to feel that way.

I testify to each of you that I know that God lives, that Jesus Christ is our Savior, and that the Book of Mormon is true. I know that as we lean on the Lord and follow his guidance, we will find joy. We will also lead others to joy. Find, teach, and baptize! In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.