"We may not know when or how the Lord’s answers will be given, but in His time and His way, I testify, His answers will come. For some answers we may have to wait until the hereafter. This may be true for some promises in our patriarchal blessings and for some blessings for family members. Let us not give up on the Lord. His blessings are eternal, not temporary."
(Waiting upon the Lord: Thy Will Be Done, http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/10/waiting-upon-the-lord-thy-will-be-done?lang=eng)
A few weeks ago while I was working on my mission papers, behind in my school work due to being sick for a week, overwhelmed by my calling, I was stuck in a boot, I was also (and still am) concerned about college, careers, and one day becoming a mother (for various reasons). I felt claustrophobic from everything. Everything seemed to be closing in on me.
I was attempting to clean my room while listening to music when I began to question everything. "Will I get my three papers done for english, history, and psychology? And get four larger cups finished in ceramics? Why was I even trying? Why would I serve a mission? How would that benefit me ever? Why can't I just stay here, go to school at home, and tell SVU that I don't want to go? Will I really ever be a mother? Would I be able to go off of my medication for the duration of the future pregnancies and such, if I can hardly concentrate on driving after missing my pill one day? Am I really smart enough to get a doctorate in history? Will I really be able to live in the dorms and successfully manage myself?" All of these things were going through my head while I was trying to pick up my room. Then "Don't You Worry Child" by Swedish House Mafia came on and I heard these words:
That's where I had my first heart break
I still remember how it all changed
My father said
Don't you worry, don't you worry child
See [God has] got a plan for you
Don't you worry, don't you worry now
Yeah!"
It was then that I had the prompting to start clearing my bedside table. I was throwing trash away and putting away books when I found my patriarchal blessing. I had thought that I already knew all of it like the back of my hand, but a prompting from the Holy Ghost isn't one to be ignored. I turned off my music, sat down on my floor by my bedside table and read my patriarchal blessing.
It was everything I needed to hear. It covered everything that I needed to know; everything that I needed to know to keep going. It gave me a glimpse of the results in store that would be in place if I did what I was supposed to do. I started to cry. God has a plan for me! He knows my struggles, my weaknesses and pains. He knows my potential, my strengths and limitations. Despite these, He still loves me! I stood up and continued to clean my room with a renewed purpose.
God loves each of us, and he has a plan for you, and you, and you! If we do what is right and follow His light, we will be blessed. I bear my testimony that I know that God still speaks to us today. He has not left us! He lives! He sent his son to suffer, die, and live for us so that we may also live again. I leave these things with you in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
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