Learning His Way

"And the Spirit said unto me: Behold, what desirest thou? And I said: I desire to behold the things which my father saw. And the Spirit said unto me: Believest thou that thy father saw the tree of which he hath spoken? And I said: Yea, thou knowest that I believe all the words of my father. And when I had spoken these words, the Spirit cried with a loud voice, saying: Hosanna to the Lord, the most high God; for he is God over all the earth, yea, even above all. And blessed art thou, Nephi, because thou believest in the Son of the most high God; wherefore, thou shalt behold the things which thou hast desired." (1 Nephi 11:2-6) 

As I was listening to the scriptures last night I heard this part and it struck me, "Nephi didn't ask why he saw the dream, because he must have had an inkling of understanding already. He asked what it meant." With a current trial I'm going through I keep asking myself why I feel this way, why is it so difficult to get over , and why now? But really I should be asking for understanding, to understand what the Lord is trying to teach me right now, and what can I learn from this.

I'm excited to learn from the Lord what he wants to teach me because I know that I will be able to, at least eventually, see this from an eternal perspective. I know that the Lord speaks to us today, and I look forward to learning more about his ways this weekend from General Conference. I leave these things with you in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. 

Tender mercies :)

So today was a rollercoaster but I had the greatest tender mercy from one of my former companions. On the mission I had helped her along the road to recovery with gaining weight again. She has a eating disorder and it was with me that she started to gain weight again and learned to be happy with it. Since being home the stress has been really hard on her and she's lost some weight. Most of our correspondence now has been recipes to try and such. Tonight she told me she is seeing a nutritionist for her eating disorder. The amount of pride and love I had when she told me about this swelled within me. I almost started to cry. I was so happy for her. I can kind of relate in some ways because I struggle to gain weight mostly because of my metabolism. I know I was meant to be a part of her life and she a part of mine.

AND yesterday I saw that on of the companions I got super close with came home and I got to talk to her on the phone for a few minutes. I am so proud of her for fulfilling her mission. She had a super difficult time for a quite a while, but she came out on top. In fact, our transfer was her do or die transfer, she either was able to work to her fullest ability with me, or she went home. Despite her anxiety, she improved leaps and bounds and became the missionary everyone knew she could become.

I know the Lord had me go on a mission, not just for the sake of going, but because I had people I needed to meet, and people that needed to meet me. I know that the Lord puts us exactly where we need to be when we follow His direction. I leave these things wit you in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Unqualified

“When we are on the Lord’s errand, we are entitled to the Lord’s help. Remember that whom the Lord calls, the Lord qualifies.” (Thomas S. Monson, “Duty Calls,” Liahona, July 1996, 42; Ensign, May 1996, 44.)

I have been thinking a lot about being a missionary and other roles I will play in my life lately. A thought kept popping up every time I would worry about those roles: "God doesn't call the qualified, he qualifies the called." As I prepare for my mission I worry some about being a good missionary, but I also worry about one day becoming a wife and mother. How would I, imperfect, obnoxious, impatient, clumsy, impulsive, blunt Lyssa, ever be a good missionary, wife, and mother? But again I am reminded that I have already been called then later qualified for a previous calling and that God will do so again.

My first calling was activity days leader. I came into that calling not knowing any of the girls, I am not crafty, and I did not know how to manage people very well. However, as time went on and I prayed for each activity to go well, that I and the girls would feel the Spirit, and we would finish the activity. I grew to love all 13 of those girls, and my testimony truly grew. I became qualified for that calling. 

I know that God will help me and guide me as I ask for help in each calling I have in my life. I know that through grace, the atonement will make up for my shortcomings. I leave these things with you in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.